Garrett Oliver, the James Beard Award-winning brewmaster of Brooklyn Brewery, is many things: a master of beer pairings, a dapper bon vivant, and a serious oenophile. Turns out, he’s also got jokes on Twitter.

Yesterday, Oliver took aim at the tired naming conventions of new-school “hipster” restaurants, using some rather obscure objects—including a decanter and a cocktail strainer—to make his point.

While we agree that the bastardization of old-time English pub names has become a scourge on the food world, we’d probably go to a restaurant called Spoon & Kukri in a heartbeat.

Here, in all their glory, are Oliver’s five “fictional hipster” restaurant ideas—coming soon to a recently gentrified neighborhood near you.

Spoon & Kukri

Knife & Decanter

Hawthorne & Cleaver

Hand & Fork

Chopper & Ladle

[via Twitter/@GarrettOliver]

RELATED: The 10 Beers That Made My Career: Garrett Oliver