There’s something primal that occurs when one witnesses food being spilled—an atavistic mixture of fear and anger that stems from a time when man’s next meal was never promised. Still, despite the deep horror humanity experiences whenever a plate crashes on the ground, or a bowl topples over the edge of a table, few could justify critically injuring a friend for the simple mistake of spilling a little bit of canned cheese dip on the floor.
Over the weekend, Michael Weston and Yolanda Tucker were arrested by police in Memphis, Tennessee after allegedly stabbing their friend in the chest with a pocketknife. According to WREG, Weston and Tucker became irate after the victim dropped some Rotel dip in their apartment building.
Not that it should matter much, but for the record, Rotel is a can of tomatoes, green chillies, and a “savory mixture of secret spices” that becomes somewhat edible after being mixed in a pot with diced cubes of Velveeta cheese.
Following the attack, the victim attempted to drive herself to the hospital, but crashed her car. She was rushed to the emergency room and is currently in critical condition.
Residents are naturally baffled by the idiocy of the crime.
“That's stupid,” one man who lives in the apartment complex told WREG. “The world is good, but the people in the world [are] just so messed up.”
Bonds for Weston and Tucker are currently set at $25,000 and $20,000, respectively, and both suspects were scheduled to appear in court on Tuesday.
In recent days, a couple in North Carolina was arrested for attacking each other with pizza rolls, and a man in Pennsylvania was charged with assault after beating his friend for refusing a bowl of ramen noodles.