Riff Raff has been on an insane diet as of late—he’s been gaining mad weight by eating late-night pizza, cheddar crab cakes for breakfast, and 4000 calories of Cajun shrimp every day.
First, we just thought “bulking up” to 240 pounds (a.k.a. becoming obese by eating crap) was something Riff was doing for shits and giggles, until the Neon Icon revealed it was because he wants to be a WWE star.
But the story gets better: Hulk Hogan is going to help Riff Raff realize his dream of wrestling professionally. Hogan’s son, Nick, even posted a “promotional video” to go along with the announcement, which JODYHiGHROLLER then tweeted. The power of the neon pythons is very real.
HULK HOGAN x RiFF RAFF aka THE NEON iCON NEON MANiA STARTS NOW BROTHER !!!!http://t.co/efD48Vyqq4
— JODY HiGHROLLER (@JODYHiGHROLLER) December 28, 2014
Can’t wait to start training with my new partner @JODYHiGHROLLER !!! Hulkamania is going NEON brother! HH — Hulk Hogan (@HulkHogan) December 28, 2014
Hulk is equally pumped up about Hulkmania going neon.
Can’t wait to start training with my new partner @JODYHiGHROLLER !!! Hulkamania is going NEON brother! HH
— Hulk Hogan (@HulkHogan) December 28, 2014
The excitement and promotional material on social media did not stop there. Here’s a video from Raff’s Insta of two women shaking their asses behind Hulk Hogan while the wrestler talks nonsense about mermaids and pythons.
What else will Riff Raff shove down his gullet to reach his “Versace goal weight” of 240 pounds? So far, he’s been feasting like there’s no tomorrow (and working out some, too).
Caption: “JUST ORDERED $789 ROOM SERViCE WiTH DiPLO iN LAS VEGAS BECUZ WE LiFTED WEiGHTS AND i WEiGH 220″
He should take the advice of a professional WWE wrestler Ryback and cook himself meals like whole wheat protein pasta and lean steak. Maybe Hulk Hogan will literally knock some sense into him when it comes to eating right and bulking up the smart way.
In other pro wrestling-meets-food news, Hardee’s repurposed footage of Brock Lesnar wrecking Triple H’s office with a sledgehammer and turned it into a commercial for the Bacon Velveeta Patty Meltdown. Uproxx asks, “Do we start calling him the ‘Beast Con Carne’ now?”
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