Review: Weighing in on London’s 3 Most Hyped Burgers

Move over, fish and chips: Burgers are the comfort-food sensation du jour in the London, and the competition is getting serious. The cues taken from Americans are hard to miss. Food trucks and market stands are multiplying around the city. High-minded sourcing is touted with pride. Elevated fast food is a buzzword. It’s all happening right now, all across the city, with the requisite army of bloggers hot on the trail of the newest and the best burgers. But hold the phone: Can a good burger really be had in London? The city, traditionally, has been an international backwater for beef in patty form. The broiled monstrosities found in English cafes, as grey and drab as the weather awaiting you when you step outside, are among the worst things you can eat anywhere in the world. After countless trips to see our family on the other side of the pond, my brother and I have learned to be wary. To take stock of the craze sweeping the city, we recently put on our arrogant American hats (you know, these ones) and pounded the pavement to put some of London’s most hyped patties through their paces. Here’s what we found.

The Hawkmoor mini empire, which now encompasses four locations, already feels like a London landmark, despite the fact that it didn’t launch until 2010. The classic cocktails, detailed in an excellent menu full of historical tidbits, are stellar, and the meatcentric offerings—bloody rump steak, insanely good potted beef served with puffy Yorkshire puddings—have set a new standard for British steakhouses. As such, it’s not surprising that, for our money, Hawksmoor currently serves the best burger in London. The best place to get it is Hawkmoor Spitalfields, which offers variants topped with kimchi or smoky bacon, but the standard edition is also served on the bar menus at the others (and you can get it at your table if you just ask). Arriving in a plate of its own juices, it’s a true steakhouse burger that’s indulgent without being overwhelming. Ogleshield cheese is mild and melty, and the lettuce, tomato and red onion are all fresh and crisp. But it’s all about the meat: 100% Longhorn steak, slightly tangy, mixed with nuggets of bone marrow that melt into the beef, and finished off with a good salty crust. The bun is a predictable brioche, but its inoffensive here, and it stands up well to the onslaught of juices. This is the benchmark steakhouse burger that the rest of London should aspire to. Hawksmoor Spitafields, 57 Commercial Street E1 6BJ (+44 020 7426 4850; thehawksmoor.com) Rating: 4/5

Just like many of its American brethren, this wildly popular operation started as a food-truck business (Meat Wagon) before spawning two perpetually mobbed brick-and-mortars outposts. Now, it’s solidified its status as London’s first true cult burger (not surprisingly, it is modeled after California’s In-N-Out). We checked out the Marylebone location, a raucous spot that falls somewhere between Anywhere, USA diner and Lower East Side crack den. Indeed, the décor and setup may put some people off from the jump—think a Hard Rock Café vision of stateside street culture, with blaring honky-tonk, creepy red lights, and loos labelled “chicks” and “dicks.” Style and interminable lines aside, though, the place does deliver with its signature burger, the Dead Hippie: two patties, American cheese, lettuce, tomato, pickles, and a “special sauce” that’s like a mashup between mayo and Thousand Island. It’s extremely messy, with all the elements squelching together in just the right proportions, and the patties are cooked to a juicy medium-rare. If the laquered bun weren’t such a dry, snoozeworthy fail, this thing would be a serious contender. A Martin’s potato roll would set it off proper. 74 Welbeck Street W1G 0BA (+44 020 7224 4239; meatliquor.com) Rating: 3.5/5 (Solid)

We were excited to check out this newcomer, both because it’s received rave reviews from the likes of Time Out London and the Guardian’s Jay Rayner, and also because the original location is part of Brixton Village, a funky artisanal market in one of the city’s best neighborhoods. But upon visiting, it didn’t take long to realize we’d been stitched up like a kipper: Even coming from the hype-fueled culture of New York City, we found the disparity between the critical plaudits and our actual experience to be extreme—the only explanations could be that the place had an off day, or Londoners simply aren’t used to eating good burgers. The signature sandwich is a classic example of a fussy pub burger gone wrong (and the place doesn’t even have the excuse of actually being a pub). Bone-dry glazed brioche bun? Check. Unnecessary sweet red-onion relish? Check. Oversized patties more akin to meatballs than discs of even thickness? Sadly, yes. Given the emphasis on sourcing—25-day dry-aged British chuck steak from Ginger Pig butcher—the biggest letdown turned out to be the meat itself. Instead of the funk and metallic tang we’re used to from dry-aged beef, we encountered dry and bland protein, exacerbated by an uneven grind that hemorrhaged juices during the cooking process. The man at the griddle tried to cover it up by salting the patties as if he were trying to kill an army of garden slugs, but that only made matters worth—oversalted bland beef is exactly the stigma British burger slingers should be trying to get away from. The final insult was rosemary salt on the fries, perhaps even more offensive than the mook-baiting truffle oil we’re used to back home. Unit 12, Brixton Village Market, Coldharbour Lane SW9 8PR +44 020 7733 7963; honestburgers.co.uk) *  4 Meard Street W1F 0EF (+44 020 3609 9524) Rating: 1/5 (Poor)  

Others London burgers to know:

Admiral Codrington: The benchmark gastropub burger, served-up in well-heeled Chelsea. theadmiralcodrington.co.uk Byron: The solid-but-not-revelatory trailblazer chain. Bonus: Strong craft-beer selection. byronhamburgers.com Burger & Lobster: The new hot spot, so much so that we were quoted a two hour wait when attempting to eat there. The choices are a burger, a lobster, or a lobster roll, and everything is £20. burgerandlobster.com