The Half Moon Pub in London’s Herne Hill was a historic music venue where everyone from U2 to Frank Sinatra graced the stage. It was also a pub where a dude named One Armed Kieth was banned for life.

The Half Moon shut its doors in 2013, but a recently released list of patrons barred from the bar has just surfaced online, and boy does it make us wish we could still visit this legendary watering hole.

The barred list reads like the IMDB page of a British gangster flick, filled with impossible-to-understand accents, twisting plots, and that one tall scary dude with the shaved head. We’d cast Vinny Jones to play Mickey Two Suits, of course. And Danny Dyer as The Ex Con Chav Twat.

The list doesn’t discriminate—or rather, it discriminates against everyone, including men, women, the disabled, the deaf, and the overweight.

No matter how politically incorrect the language is, the Half Moon sounds like it was the place to be. We just wish that Bono would have been added to the list, but you never know—maybe he was the Staring Pervert.

[via Uproxx]