If you have a name that is any less common than Mary and John, you’ve probably witnessed a Starbucks barista spell and/or call out your name horribly wrong. Apparently this has happened enough times for Saturday Night Live to distill the experience into a mock commercial, aired over the weekend.

While there were a few sketches related to food from Saturday’s episode featuring Jennifer Lawrence (Top Dog Chef and 50s Diner), the phony commercial was the most noteworthy. It’s an honor often reserved for mainstream products like Mom jeans and corn syrup.

How does SNL imagine the Starbucks experience in one’s home? It begins with a K-cup coffee machine named Verismo. It will make every effort to get your name and order wrong, then seek out companion Verquonica, “a large non-functional machine for Verismo to talk to about you.” Verismo also comes with decorative touches like “non-refrigerated milk pitchers, a bunch of discarded wooden stirs, and a packet of Sugar in the Raw smashed in a puddle of cream.”