How to Eat at a Breastaurant Without Being Creepy

Yeah yeah, we know—you're there for "the wings."

bikinis_eyecontact

Bikinis Sports Bar & Grill

1. Make eye contact when you talk to her.

There’s a weird moment waiting to happen when you are greeted by your server at a breastaurant, especially when it’s one whose uniform is especially egregious and underwear-like, such as the ones at Twin Peaks or Tilted Kilt (which make Hooters look like a family restaurant by comparison). One of the most basic rules of society is called into question: You know that it is inappropriate and creepy to stare at a woman's boobs, but if that woman works at a restaurant whose entire raison d'être is dressing women in uniforms that show off said boobs, does that change things? And the answer is: kinda, but not really. Yes, your server is definitely used to her customers checking her out constantly and asking her tits for an extra napkin to go with the saucy wings. But just because she has come to expect that doesn’t mean that she won’t appreciate a little eye contact. And wouldn’t you rather be the dude who stood out from the pack of neanderthals at the bar?

Newsletter

Feed your inbox.

Subscribe