A word to the wise: don’t fuck with Anthony Bourdain. Known for his sharp tongue and quick wit, the chef has survived war zones and drug addictions, and will not hesitate to put you in your damn place if you interrupt his monologue.

Last week, during a stop on Bourdain’s “The Hunger” tour in San Francisco, a protester approached the stage at the War Memorial Opera House and started heckling the chef about eating dog meat, TMZ reports.

Listening politely to the woman’s complaints as the crowd around them booed, Bourdain heard the heckler out before letting some zingers of his own fly.

“I like dogs. But how much worse can they be than, like, kale?” Bourdain asked. “20 more seconds of this I’m going out and shooting a puppy in the fucking head.”

Needless to say, the audience cheered in delight at Bourdain’s threat (well, we hope it was just a threat…), wondering aloud why security hadn’t removed the woman from the theater yet. “It’s so good to be back in San Francisco!” Bourdain continued. “Would you be kind enough now to fuck off?”

TMZ caught up with the chef the next day, and Bourdain reiterated his claim that he had never, in fact, dined on any K9 delicacies.

“I was rudely interrupted at my performance last night mid-dick joke by an earnest, very nice, but rather strident advocate for animal rights,” he said. “Her concern had something to do with dog meat, I gather. And as I pointed out to her, I’ve never eaten dog meat. I have no plans to do so. I like dogs. But after three minutes of her haranguing, I may or may not have threatened to run out and get myself a puppy smoothy.”

Let’s all just be thankful that the confrontation didn’t escalate that far.

[via TMZ]