We’re living in an age of mashup-food mania, a time in which a new frankenfood unveils itself everyday. To help you keep up with all the new hypebeast snacks on the scene, we’ll be doing a weekly roundup of ridiculous mashup foods you need to know about right now, and ranking them on staying power. Read on!

Bloody Mary + Bagel = Lox’d & Loaded

The mashup: We’ve seen some cocktail garnishes in our time, but Buffalo & Bergen in Washington D.C. have decorated a brunch cocktail with actual brunch, which is pretty awesome. The Lox’d & Loaded swizzle consists of a whole bagel with lox and cream cheese, for those mornings when celery just doesn’t cut it.

Staying power: Medium. This is obviously fun to order but seeing as this is unchartered territory we have a few questions. Will they give us a plate for the bagel? Are we supposed to tip 20-25% or $1 a drink? Is $18 a good price for a bagel and a cocktail? We’ve still got a few things to figure out here.


Nachos + Pork = Pork Rind Nachos

https://twitter.com/darrenrovell/status/583649417489682434

The mashup: There’s no doubt in our minds that the minor league teams have the best food in baseball. We’re still reeling from the Wilmington Bluerocks’ Donut Dog and the Arizona Diamondbacks’ Churro Dog. Now the Toledo Mud Hens have unveiled this mindsplosion: pork rind nachos topped with melted cheese, pulled pork, and bacon.

Staying power: Low. These gut-busting stadium foods are mostly to drum up excitement for the upcoming season, and are relatively short lived novelty items. Sadly, all that will remain of this ode to swine post-season are a few porky burps lingering in the stadium air, at which point the only thing that will comfort us is another ridiculous form of nachos.


Cadbury Creme Egg + Chocolate Cake = Cadbury Scotch Egg

Photo: Thrillist

The mashup: Cadbury Creme Egg fever doesn’t seem to have abated despite the fact that Kraft is ruining the cultish Easter candy in Britain. You can find them in donuts, cronutsmilkshakes, and pies—but we’re particularly taken with these gorgeous looking chocolate Scotch eggs. They’re way prettier than this omelet, for instance, which looks like a peep had an accident on a plate.

Staying power: Low. This egg is a thing of beauty, wrapped in chocolate cake in place of mince meat, rolled in Cocoa Krispies instead of breadcrumbs, and deep fried to molten, gooey perfection. But realistically we’d never make it past step 1 of the recipe: Freeze Cadbury eggs for at least 30 minutes. Does the recipe still work if we eat all the eggs in front of an open refrigerator? (Photo: Thrillist)


Fried Chicken + Waffle Cone = Fried Chicken Cone

chx

The mashup: A freshly baked, rolled waffle cone stuffed with mashed potatoes, fried chicken nuggets, and a drizzle of honey mustard. We’re talking real mashed potatoes, not instant. This beast will be served at Minute Maid Park, home of the Houston Astros.

Staying power: High (as long as not too many people go into cardiac arrest after eating it). Just look at that thing.