The New York Times has apparently employed a cat critic, Mittens, to review pet food. An ad for cat food written in the style of a restaurant review ran in the New York Times’ dining section today, reports Eater. First We Feast pup critic Oscar the Schnoodle is not happy that someone is jacking his swagger and getting in on the pet food reviewing game, too. He had previously monopolized the career sector, ever since he reviewed Rachel Ray’s dog recipes for this very site.

Oscar thinks the name of the restaurant being reviewed, “Merrick Purrfect Bistro,” is cheesy, lame, and just a bad choice overall. How can Mittens even contemplate reviewing a restaurant with a name like that? Although, the pup can’t deny that calling lobster fra diavolo “‘fra devoid’ of flavor” is witty and extremely punny. Maybe Mittens is the real deal? Oscar is watching his back for now, but still knows he is the Yeezus of the pet food reviewing world.

[via Eater]