There’s nothing better than hitting the town with your squad and drinking like tomorrow doesn’t exist. The catch is, tomorrow does exist, and the morning after a night of downing Old Fashioneds or margs can feel pretty bleak.

But there’s hope, hungover friend. We enlisted the help of Portland’s top bartenders (as well as a couple industry people from across the country) to divulge their tried-and-true hangover cures for those mornings when you feel like you’re going to die. From breakfast burritos, to pho doused with chili paste, to plain old morning-after intercourse, these are essential hangover remedies from experienced drinkers.


Jeffrey Morgenthaler

Bar manager at Clyde Common and Pépé Le Moko

morgenMorgenthaler says: “Obviously the only real cure is rehydration and time. I’ve never liked the Hair of the Dog idea, it just stalls the inevitable. Lots of really good food (specifically, the chicken curry soup at Ha VL), tons of liquids, and some good old-fashioned Alka Seltzer has always been my go-to.” (Photo: David Reamer, Flickr/cea)


Sean Hoard

Co-founder of The CommissaryburrHoard says: “Step 1: Listen to Top 40 Radio in the shower. Step 2: Breakfast burrito and hot coffee. Step 3: Watch at least an hour of Sportscenter. Repeat entire process until symptoms subside.” (Photo: Sean Hoard, Yelp)


Eric “ET” Tecosky

Bar Manager at Jones Hollywood; Jack Daniel’s Brand Ambassadorjd Tecosky says: “A shot of cold olive juice or pickle juice does the trick. If that’s not available, you can never go wrong with a cold can of Coke.” (Photo: Jack Daniel’s, Wikimedia Commons)


Douglas Derrick

Bar Manager at Ava Genes and unofficial President of Negroni

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Derrick says: “Water, ibuprofen, and sleep, then coffee and more water. But, a good answer really is sex. A Woodsman Tavern Glass-Aged Bloody Mary is a distant third.” (Photo: Twitter, Flickr/Max Sparber


Angel Teta

Bar manager at AtaulasweeeeetttteaTeta says: “Being from the south, I always rely on a tall glass of sweet tea and a squeeze of lemon. If I want to just continue my Johnny Bender, I get a shot and a beer at my favorite dive, with a side of fried chicken.” (Photo: Cristena Baez, Flickr)


Estanislano “Tanis” Orona

Bartender at Raven & Rose

runrunOrona says: “Well, it starts before hitting the sheets at night. My cure is a pint glass of water and a couple of ibuprofen before sleeping. In the morning: another pint of water, some sort of caffeine, a light breakfast, followed by a short run; it really helps to get the blood pumping, sweat out some of those toxins, and get the endorphin levels up.” (Photo: Tanis Orona, Flickr)


David Kwon

Bartender at Bit House SaloonsouuupKwon says: “Soup. More specifically, pho. Luc Lac might be the best pho I’ve had in a long time, but I’m still learning the vast landscape of Asian soup in Portland.” (Photo: David Kwon, Instagram/@jennydrinks)


Jordan Felix

Bar Manager at the Multnomah Whiskey Library

getmeouttahereFelix says: “Hydration first. [Specifically] sparkling mineral water, Gatorade, and salt water. Get those electrolytes back. Then a simple but filling breakfast burrito. Hold the extra cheese. Sunshine also helps immensely.” (Photo: Jordan Felix, Gatorade.com)


Emily Mistell

Bartender at the Rum ClubemilyMistell says: “The best hangover cure is chugging water all night with your drink. When you get home after being out all night and drinking too many shots make sure to take a couple ibuprofen and take a long hot shower. Waking up with you makeup and hair done from the night before is never a good feeling. In the morning, take a couple more ibuprofen and drink more water and a glass of fresh grapefruit juice and a cup of coffee and make a piece of toast even if you’re not hungry. But the BEST hangover cure is a really good night’s sleep and time. There is no magic cure if you drank too much tequila except time and water and sleep.” (Photo: Emily Mistell, Wikimedia Commons)


Charles Joly

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Joly says: “Since I always consume responsibly, I’ll have to take my best guess at these. After a night of responsible imbibing this past week, a bowl of brothy pho with a healthy dose of chile paste helped revitalize me. The best cure is avoidance. Drink plenty of water and avoid shots.” (Photo: Lush Life Productions, The Flirty Foodie)